Great table for when a player misses a session

I'm putting this here, so I never ever lose it again.  (Zack's site is generally not safe for work, but this direct link SHOULD be okay... no blaming me if you just can't wait to get home and open it at the office and get fired... although, if you do, can I have your job?)

Er, sorry, anywhere, here it is:   Where the Hell have you been Flake Table, at DnD with Porn Stars